Tag: hearing loss

My Daughter

· 5 Comments ·

ImageMy Daughter is one of the strongest girls I know.  She has been through a lot in her 10 years.  She is one of the most caring, feisty, and good friend you could ask for.  I have talked a lot about my son and the amount of energy he takes to raise.  My daughter falls to the side at times and I thought I need to brag about her some.  

Yesterday I had an audiology appt about 40 minutes away from home.  The nice thing with vacation is my husband was home with Henry. So Greta and I road tripped to town.  We had the best time!!! We talked school, friends, TaeKwonDo and much more.  I told her stories of when I went to Jamaica on a mission trip.  It was 21 years ago yesterday that I went there.  Seems like yesterday I went it is so vivid but telling a 10 year old that is was that long ago made me feel a little old.  She loved hearing the stories of when I was young and in high school. 

Greta went with me to my appointment and I think she enjoyed it.  I think she was amazed that my hearing aid could be hooked to a computer and programs changed and certain sound levels upped AGAIN, all on a computer and seeing everything graphed out on the screen.  Who knows maybe we have a future Audiologist on my hands.  She asked questions and was just so grown up.  She amazes me everyday where did my little girl go.  

We ended up doing a little shopping in town and then headed home.  Just so nice to hear her ideas in life and her likes and dislikes.  She talked about bullying in her school.  She is so determined to give everyone a chance and a kid getting teased or left out just whips her up into a frenzy.  I really won’t be surprised if one day I get called to the school for punching a kid.  I don’t advocate this but if she is defending a kid who is getting picked on I can’t fault her.  

My dear Greta has a big TaeKwonDo test coming up.  Next week she is going for her 2nd degree POOM belt( Jr black belt).  My heart couldn’t be prouder.  Watching them train day after day at the gym and their determination fills me with hope for these kids and their futures.  The amount of information, board breaking, numchucks, and lots of other material is mind boggling but these 3 girls that are going for the promotion KNOW IT.  This picture is from almost 2 years ago when she earned her POOM belt in 2012. 

Raising a daughter who is not spoiled on money, would give her jacket to a stranger if they look cold, and feels their job is to defend everyone makes me feel like maybe I am doing something right as a mom.  

I will get my Christmas Spirit back

· 1 Comment ·

Wow almost Christmas and we are so busy it is just crazy town here.  Christmas party tonight for the kids, school Christmas parties tomorrow for the kids.  Traveling out of town this weekend for the Holiday and NOTHING IS DONE!!! I need to pack, I need to wrap presents, I need to make sure I have everything we need to travel.

Do you ever feel like you are in the trap of the hamster wheel.  There is just so much going on but you just keep on running and running in that circle of life.  You can see out of the corner of your eye all the other stuff that needs to be done but you just keep on running and running and that extra stuff gets left behind.  That is how the holidays feel for me this year.  I am going through the motions but nothing has hit me yet that it is here.

My life has changed in the past couple months and I needed to time to step back and reflect on this new normal.  I went from why me, to is this going to get worse, to now it is I have moderate hearing loss lets except it and move on.  I was kinda in this fog and sadly that fog took away the joy of getting ready for the Holidays.  I feel behind now, I feel cheated somehow.  I know it was my own doing but I feel the spirit of getting ready for this joyous time of year was taken from me this year.  I will get it back.  I am determined to get that feeling of Christmas back.

I will put the Christmas music on…LOUD. I will wrap presents, load a car and get kids ready for grandma’s.  We won’t be riding a sleigh but we can go over a river and pass some trees to grandmothers house we go.  We will remember what Christmas is to us.  It is a time to remember that God gave his son for us to be our savior.  It is a time to remember that this baby came into the world to die for our sins.  I have everlasting life because of this babe in a manger.  I don’t ever want that feeling to go away. I won’t be cheated.

The Day of my Son

· Leave a comment ·

So today was the day of my son from morning till night.  The day started out today with an IEP meeting for my son.  I am so happy with the progress Henry has made this year so far.  We still have some issues but most of the conversation today was the positives.  So we need to work on writing and reading so basically letters.  He is wonderful at numbers and the testing really showed that strength.  When Henry was very young he told me numbers lived in his tummy.  I think those numbers are coming out.  He loves math, patterns, and counting everything.  The big needs are his sensory needs.  I was told by each person that tested my son that his shirt, hand, or a chewy was in his mouth at all times.  I was also told he was constant movement.  Well that was no shock to me I live with him.  Another concern brought up was his hearing.  He has tested the past couple years at borderline hearing loss.  We had a deaf/Hard of Hearing teacher at the meeting so she explained what he heard and how.  She also explained how this hindered learning even having borderline hearing loss.  So the question I was dreading came out.  Is there any family history of hearing loss with Henry.  Well I had to let my secret out.  I don’t know why I didn’t want to say it but I had to say YES I have hearing loss at a moderate loss.  I know what it is like to not be able to hear a conversation or concentrate so hard on someone talking it is physically and mentally exhausting. So everyone together is going to really watch him and make sure he can get the best out of his education.  It was a good meeting and I think it will all be good.

Tonight was Henry’s orange belt test for TaeKwonDo.  He didn’t pass tonight but did great.  He sat at attention so well!! He even broke his first board.  He did great and only needs to pass one item on Wednesday.  I was very proud of all the kids there tonight.

It has been a day of being proud of my little man.  I am sure there will be many more of these days-today was a good one.  2013-12-16 18.52.53

Busy Day

· Leave a comment ·

Today was one of those days where you just fall into the couch in the evening and take a deep breath and just think of all that was done in a 24 hour period.  My morning started at 5am when I had two great kids dropped off at my house to take to school in the morning.  Helping a friend out who has helped me so many times.  Then I had to drive to a neighboring town.  Living in the middle of no where has advantages and disadvantages.  One disadvantage would be a near 45 minute drive to any medical specialist, any major store, or restaurant.  Well today was another audiologist appointment.  I still could not hear anyone who was talking quietly or softly.  I am not sure if I could when I could when I got the hearing aid or did my hearing slide a little more down.  I am guessing the second of the two is what is happening.  Well I had it upped two more levels and I think it will help.  Technology is a beautiful thing seeing everything charted on a computer screen is really a cool thing.  Maybe I am a nerd when it comes to that stuff but seeing where my hearing lies on the chart and what is being picked up and by how much is kinda cool.  Left the office hearing a little more of the environment that I was missing.  Wow you can hear jingling keys in your pocket.

Stopped by Target and you never know what you will see, or have the impulse to buy.  I saw a friend from town shopping on her own also today so we shopped together and then out to breakfast.  What a nice surprise.  We talked that if we would have tried to plan this meeting and breakfast it would have never happened so nice to have a surprise like this.  A great friend that we can talk freely about Autism, Sensory Processing Disorder, school challenges, and life challenges.  So nice to know your not alone in the world.  A few more stops than the drive back home.

You know I said I wasn’t really in the Christmas spirit well I figured we better put a Christmas tree up so that was our after school project.  The kids were nuts to get that tree up.  Well they think it is the most beautiful tree they have ever seen.  ME- It is awful.  It is a cheap small artificial tree that is so misshapen it should be in the trash can.  Only half the lights worked so it is very pieced together and I guess a tree only a child could love.

It was a busy day but a day of some new hearing, breakfast with a friend, and an ugly tree that has children in awe.

Only when we walk in the dark we see the Stars

· Leave a comment ·

So I am sitting in the silence of the morning hours.  Sun hasn’t come up yet and words haven’t been spoken yet.  I think about this upcoming couple days and what the agenda will be.  Today we have Christmas program practice at church.  That is always a fun time.  Maybe a little chaotic.  Little ones running around trying to round them up like they are the sheep and we are the sheep dogs.  This afternoon I may try to get some of the house decorated for Christmas.  Kids are driving me nuts that we have to get that tree up.  True enough we need to do that.  Tomorrow is Church, Sunday school and then Caroling in the community.  Always a fun event.  Traveling in a group from one place to the next trying to spread some of the Christmas spirit.  We end the night with a soup supper always a highlight for our family.  I sit here this morning by the computer awed by the changes we have had this year.  I have a daughter that is excelling in school and over at the “big” school. She is just growing up out of that little girl.  My son who I didn’t think would be able to handle school LOVES to go to school and Sunday afternoon is just a long waste of time to get to Monday.  I look how our family is changed.  I was in such a fog of disbelief lately with my sudden hearing loss that I failed to notice the good things that are going on with our family.  So I have decided to try and make a list of the positives I have learned with having hearing aids and hearing loss.

1. I savor every I love you I get from my kids.  I was upset I still can’t hear the whispered ones but I know what they are saying it still melts your heart.

2. I enjoy the absolute silence I have in the house before everyone is up and after everyone goes to bed.

3. Watching has become very important to me.  Watching my kids interact.  Sure a kick comes into play but the holding of hands or cuddling together to read a book became even more precious.

4. Empathy- I feel I have more empathy with the kids at school that struggle at the things that seem so simple to other children.

gotta have some funny ones

5. We have a faucet that drips at times.  I can turn the hearing aid to mute and instant drip is gone.

6. Kids fighting in the bedroom. Again mute and fighting is gone for that moment.

I am glad that I took the time to write a list.  It makes you put things in perspective. Sometimes taking part of one sense away does open your eyes to other things around you.

Night Silence

· Leave a comment ·

I find myself compelled to write about things that I wasn’t planning on writing about in this blog. But isn’t that life the unknown the ever changing.  Has anyone ever had everything planned out and it really goes that way? Maybe some but was it interesting then? As I sit down to write this I can’t get over how quiet it is in the house.  Everyone is in bed and my hearing aid is out for the night.  It is total silence.  There is no dripping faucets, no creaky floor boards, no furnace or fridge running.  I see an occasional car drive by but no sound.  How strange this is but at the same time amazing.  How you go into life and then the unforeseen detour on the road takes you on another direction.  So we are in for a major snow storm some saying upwards of 10 inches. Now the power just went out.  I am not kidding you can’t make this stuff up.  See the unforeseen always seems to happen.  So when this new path comes up what are you to do?  Learn to deal, make the best of it, find the positives, I guess I am still trying to figure that out.  I know my drive to write has been heightened and I want to go with that.  It is a wonderful outlet and maybe it will go somewhere someday.  Listening to music has been an obsession of mine for the past few days.  I don’t know why, I am a tv person. Love having the tv on as background noise and it is on all the time.  I haven’t turned it on in 3 days.  Kids think I am going nuts. I wonder why the music, am I somehow worried someday I won’t hear it?  Not sure, it has to be turned way up but I am loving it lately.  Life is an always changing organism. I am finding that out a lot in the past few years. With a move out to the Prairies of MN, with a son who receives an SPD and Autism Spectrum diagnosis and now hearing loss.  Always changing and we have to be receptive maybe not willingly but life goes on and we want to go with it.