Tag: careers

Plot Twist

plot twist

I like order, and I like things planned out whether it is on paper or in my head.  This summer was spent trying to figure out this next year of my life.  What would I do for a job, I longed for a change.  To make a difference in someones life not a sub that floats in and out each day different.  I tried for other jobs and nothing seemed to work out.  I finally took a job and I was excited for it.  The job ended last week after I quit.  I was not disclosed some pretty important information and for that reason I quit.  I felt upset, scared and betrayed.  I had this year planned out in my head and now it is all gone.  I took the week and thought pretty long and hard of what happened and I believe I can just say PLOT TWIST and move on.  Life didn’t go how it was all planned out in my head.  God is the only one that can know our future and he knew this turn was going to take place.

I went back to subbing last week and spent two days at the school.  It felt great catching up with the kids and hearing what they had done for their summer vacations.  It was nice to see staff and say our hello’s.  It wasn’t how I was expecting to spend those days but it was familiar and comfortable.  I still don’t want to be a sub forever.  I need more of a purpose a beginning and end of what I am doing to know that I made a difference on someones life.

Chad, my husband, said to me this weekend “Sara you are pushing 40 it is about time to figure out what you want to do with your life.”  That is so true.  I went to school, then graduated college, obtained a full time job.  Never something I loved but it was an income my desires were to be a wife and a mother.  I was successful on that front and that is what matters most in my life.  I feel this pull now, I am in my research phase now of different career choices.  I get a little nuts when I find a topic I enjoy.  I will stay up till the wee hours of the morning, reading, and making notes.  I am starting to put some feelers out will be doing some work on some different ideas in the next couple weeks.  Maybe it is not in the stars for this path to open up but we will just have to see what happens in my life.

Remember when something happens that you weren’t expecting just yell Plot Twist and move on.  I have done that with moving, having a child diagnosed on the Autism Spectrum, hearing loss, and jobs.  Life takes twists and turns you never expect.  Yell Plot Twist or you will dwell in these turns that you will never see the beautiful clearings that you are about to come to: Living in the beautiful prairie, having a son that has taught me to look at the world a little different, meeting friends and learning so much in this past year, being back at the school that is familiar and I am needed.

Life just isn’t a straight line it is like a river that meanders and the slow curves that the water has carved in the banks.

meandering-river

Advertisements

Life as a Substitute Teacher

Life as a substitute teacher is a life of the unknown. Do I work today or not? Always a question of where to work, what grade, and what kids.  I have been hard of hearing at this level for about 6 months or so. I am very new to this chapter of my life. A few people have told me, that I was proactive and didn’t stay in the land of denial and disbelief for any amount of time. I think the main reason I was proactive and ordered that first hearing aid was because I was sure I wouldn’t be able to work at the school, I wouldn’t be able to hear the kids all talking to me at once. I FEARED the loss of my job. I still have a problem with many kids talking at once, hearing aids are aids not miracles. I felt in my heart of hearts if I didn’t tackle this head on and immediately I would no longer have a job.

So what changes if any did I need to make as a substitute teacher and hard of hearing. One major thing I had to do was make sure I got those calls at 6:30 in the morning. We live in a small house and only have one phone jack so one phone in the house that is not in a bedroom, living room, or the basement. I have the school call my cell phone. I can usually remember to have that with me.   I also had to make sure my ringtone is nice and loud, but I also don’t want to annoy anyone else around me. The one thing I was given which I really like is this little device.

2014-04-23 11.57.44

This nice little battery operated stand will start brightly flashing when the phone has vibrated. This has been a great thing when I happen to be sleeping, and no hearing aids in.  I don’t hear the phone call but open my eyes to a light flashing. I can call the school back and not miss those jobs. Before I had this I was missing a lot of calls and I had to do something I was dreading. I had to let our secretary know that I am hard of hearing and I am missing your phone calls not just ignoring you. I got the kindest response, just a big thank you for all the subbing I do. I am not sure why I was so scared to let someone know.

I work in our local school district, which is small town and maybe 60-70 kids per grade level. A lot smaller then I was raised with. With having such a small amount of kids I know them. I have worked with them for 7 years; I have seen these kids grow. One thing I really like to use in the classroom is an FM system. I have seen these used before. Some teachers use them and some don’t. My son has an IEP and it states use of the FM system for his mild hearing loss. I try to use the FM system in every class I am in. For myself, and for students the use of the microphone is a nice way to make an effort that everyone can hear what is going on in the classroom.  I try to have no one including myself left behind.

There are classes that are much easier for me to teach in than others. Kindergarten through about 2nd grade really scares me. Why…they all talk to me at once in their little voices. I miss a huge amount of the content of what they are saying. I really try to implement one child at a time when I am in the class. An English class is usually an easy one, quiet and usually just reading. Now coming up I will be the agriculture teacher for three days. I know already this will be very stressful. It is a huge room with industrial fans, shop noise with industrial tech next door. I will sit facing the students and the door ( I don’t hear someone coming in the room), kids now to come up to me and face me to ask to leave class.

I guess my job is the same as all subs. I just have to make sure I am aware of what is going on. Make sure my eyes are on the kids and the kid’s eyes are on me. I would like to hear about what if any changes you have had to make in your career.

Feeling Blessed

The past couple week for me have been ones of thinking, planning and reflecting.  I feel a strong tug to do something different in my life.  If that is a different job, different volunteer opportunities and different experiences.  It has to be little baby steps and living in a rural area nothing is close, I don’t have a plethora of opportunities.  So I made up my resume.  I think it has been almost 15 years since I have done a resume.  It has been a good learning experience.  I have applied for a few jobs and I have been turned down for a few jobs.

Last week I applied for a very unique experience.  I have had a 45 minute phone interview (thank you for an amplified phone).  If I would get this job I would be a literacy tutor for grades K-3 in our local school.  What an awesome opportunity.  To be a constant in a childs life and get them to that magical goal of reading.  I hope I can be that person in a little persons life.  I hope to hear this week if I will be going on to the next interview.

Another part of the dreaming comes with this tutor job.  At the end of my year I would receive an education gift.  It is a rather good amount of money to further my education.  Wow does the dreaming begin.  What would I do?  What would I study?  I don’t know I have ideas swirling in my head faster than snowflakes in a blizzard.  I am thinking deaf and hard of hearing something with that.  Maybe teacher for deaf and hard of hearing or a vocational or rehabilitation counselor.  Just don’t know too many decisions.

Then today to start of the week with a blessing and a half.  I subbed in Ag again today.  I have to say it was much better today than the last time.  Not one scissor got thrown across the room.  I shouldn’t even have to say that.  So back to the issue at hand…got home to a letter in the mailbox.  I was gifted a hearing aid from the Sertoma club.  I was beyond speechless and tears were flowing.  I will be balanced (haha-one in both ears).  This is a gift I can never repay and I am so humbled.  I go to my audiologist on Thursday morning.

We just had our wedding anniversary and I just feel this will be a year of changes and I pray these changes will be good ones for our family.

14 Years of Togetherness

14 years….wow that is a long time.  We are getting close to the amount of time that I will be with Chad longer than with my parents (almost 16 with dating).  14 years ago on the afternoon of April 8th I married Chad.  We had a nice simple afternoon wedding.  We had a small reception in the church hall and we were off to our hotel in the cities by 5pm.  I watch the TLC show, Four Weddings and I am shocked but the amount of money that is spent on a wedding.  Ours was simple and completely done by us.  Would the majority of people be able to accept a wedding like ours? Would they be able to deal with homemade centerpieces and beautiful flowers in mason jars? To me that day was magical.  I get remorseful at times and wish I would have had a big wedding with a dance and the whole shabang but you know what, I enjoyed our day.  I am not a center of attention person and our wedding had DIY, family, friends and fellowship.  It was our wedding and I will always cherish it.  

Now I am a bit of a superstitious person.  Ok more than a bit, if something bad happens at 10am on a Saturday for years from that day I still will get apprehensive at 10am on a Saturday because that could happen again.  We are almost done with our 13th year and for that I can breath a sigh of relief.  I hate the number 13 and year 13 had a fair share of things I would like to forget and move on from.  To start off our 13th year Greta, Henry, and myself were throwing up all night long.  My poor husband was stripping beds, washing floors and washing buckets on our anniversary.  That showed real love.  Chad got a serious leg infection that was down right scary.  Doctor visits, meds, and lots of prayer got him better but his leg is still not at 100%.  I became hard of hearing this year.  It is a new normal for me and I feel I am adjusting much better now than a few months ago but still a shock.  I crashed the only vehicle I LOVED and totaled it.  I had my first trip in an ambulance this year.  My beloved Grandmother died this year.  Just a lot of things I am glad are behind me.  With all that being said there was plenty of good also.  Henry started school and as much as he didn’t want to go to school he is doing great and loves it.  Greta is at the “big” school now and she is doing great.  Her empathy for people grows everyday and I love that about her.  We got to go on a family vacation this past year to Wisconsin Dells.  It was a few days of family fun that we made a lot of memories.  

What will this new year bring for us?  I am sure there will be changes that is what life is the ever changing.  The simple act of breathing and living will bring growth and change.  I hope this will be a year of good changes, maybe careers, kids activities, my faith growing stronger.  I want this to be a year of memories with my family and personal strides we can all make.  

14 years I love Chad and the family we have made.  It sure hasn’t been a path of roses but we have made a path through the vines of thorns and discovered the roses on the way.  

What Do I Want To Do When I Grow Up

My life as a substitute teacher.  When your main job is a substitute you need to expect the unknown.  I look at the calendar for the week and can get discouraged because I will only have one day scheduled.  I feel sad, defeated because at this stage of my life, both of my kids in school, I want to work full time.  6:30am will hit on Monday morning and the phone will ring and they need a sub.  That is what it is like, a boring outlook on the calander and then boom I am working almost everyday.  It happens so fast and is really is always in the air.  I will get settled in a class and then get called out and have to move to another class or move to the other school.  It is always changing it is the unknown.

I must have hit a point in my life that I need stability again.  I started working as a waitress at the age of 15 and worked at a small cafe till the end of my senior year.  Even before that I delivered the daily paper, The Stillwater Gazette.  I have working blood and it has always run thick.  I got through college in 4 years and that was with working a good amount of hours each week at a job and working up to two jobs in the summers.  College isn’t cheap ya know.  So when Henry was born I decided to stay home.  Then he was so sick and we had so many doctor appts, and therapy appts a full time job would not have fit in.  Now both kids are in school and that working blood is needing to be tended.  I need to know I am going to work each day and now I have hours coming in every week.

So my problem is what can I do for a job or career.  I have subbed k-12 for almost the past 7 years.  I love the school and I love the kids but there isn’t a list of job openings at the school at the time.  I went to school for Communicative Disorders with an emphasis in Audiology.  I have not obtained my Masters so I can not practice speech therapy and to be honest I can’t see myself doing that or wanting to do that.  Now audiology is a completely different story.  I enjoy the science of the ear.  I used to like making out an audiogram and graphing left ear and right ear with masked sounds and unmasked.  Now what do I do with that and living in small town, I don’t live in a metro area where there are a lot of towns around that may have openings.  So I research and read and I update my resume and just wonder what to do.

My ideal world I could get a job I would work with an audiologist or in a hearing aid office.  I know most say 1-2 years of experience.  How in the world can you get that experience if you can’t get in somewhere.  Oh well for now I will live the life of the unknown sub.  This week I was a Title 1 teacher, a 6th grade teacher, and 2 days as a 5th grade teacher.  I love the amount of days but I just need to know and have that consistency.

I will take input from anyone on this subject or hey want to offer me the job of the century- I am “ALL EARS”

Who am I…according to a quiz

If you don’t live under a rock and visit Facebook with any regularity you have seen quiz after quiz lately.  I have fun doing these quizzes and then having my husband do these quizzes and laughing about our results.

If I were to live my life by these quizzes I need to make a lot of changes, I am doing so many things wrong.  First I live in the wrong state.  As we have 1 degree right now with blowing snow I have a hard time debating this quiz.  One quiz I took said I should be living in the city of Portland.  My husband also got this result so maybe it is the correct answer.  I sure could get out of this horrible cold tundra.  I usually love Minnesota but right now it is getting me a little down.  I also got a quiz that said I should live in Kansas.  That wouldn’t be to bad.  Middle of the country and looks a lot like here.  Something to think of if life here gets too horrible.  I am sure these short quizzes with pick which song you like best knows the best for me.  Does the sarcasm come through.

Next I am a child of the 60’s according to one quiz.  I am going to agree with this one.  I come off as very conservative but if I could let some of this shyness go yes a child of the 60’s would be it.  I love the music of that era and the free-ness of it also.  I love the message of love yourself and others no matter who they are.  Isn’t that what we are called to do? Love our neighbors.  So I will play my 60’s music and teach my daughter how to make simple long hippie skirts like I did in college and try to pass it on to someone.  She might be a hard nut to crack.  Been around her dad, love him dearly, to long.  He is NOT a 60’s child at all.

Next is my career.  I should think long and hard about these results.  I was told I should be a writer.  I like that idea and when I was very young I wanted to write for a newspaper when I became an adult so again not so far off.  I went to college for Communicative Disorders and psychology.  I then worked at a maximum security prison for ten years before moving to the prairie.  I have done little jobs here and there but the main one is being a substitute teacher.  I enjoy it and I like seeing the kids grow and mature, well some of them.  I do want more and I think that is normal to want more.  I have thought about trying to do something in my field without getting that masters degree.  I have thought about getting a masters and I have thought about writing for a small town newspaper just like when I was a young girl.  So many question come up when taking a simple Facebook quiz.

The last one I am going to touch on is a quiz I had our whole family take this weekend.  It was what side of the brain are you?  Are you a left brain thinker so more logical and thought out or right brain which is spontaneous and creative.  I have this in the bag I thought I am the right brain.  I love trying to be crafty and create something.  Was I wrong!!! I got 91% left brain.  For some reason this crushed me.  Am I not creative? I am not spontaneous at all?  My husband got 50-50 which I thought was a joke.  He is not creative at all (I say that in love).  My daughter and son were also almost equal but with more going to the right brain side.  Wow these results really bothered me.  Was I so order driven and logical?  We talked about these results all weekend and I think they were correct.  I am left brain.  I love searching Pinterest for craft ideas.  The thing I noticed is I look at a craft and in my head it is what do I need, how do I set this up, when is the best time to try this.  Holy cow I think of order and logic in terms of creating, not just create.  Any health crisis that has come to my family I do more research then the FBI.  Any school meeting, IEP meeting etc…I seem to almost know more about the subject then the other members present.  I crave knowledge and information.  I research something every single day.  I think having 91% left brain is an OK thing.  We need all kinds to make the world go round.

Now do I believe that a simple quiz on Facebook can tell me about my life and how to live my life?  Probably not but it sure makes you think about the decisions I have made and my future that has not been written yet.